My Utmost for His Highest

I have been sensing strongly that this next year, starting right now, I have a critical decision to make. Whether to follow God and Jesus whole heartedly or whether to be lukewarm, safe, comfortable and follow my own interests. Whew. It is a hard decision, yet there is only one answer. I want to follow Him and seek Him only to all other exlusions. But can I do it? I am scared of my own failings and weak, fearful, sinful nature. I certainly can't do it without God's help. But then I do have that.

Anyway, I came across an old devotional, one of my favorites I have read many times and am starting to re-read it now. I got it when I was in college and it was my first devotional to do. It is, "My Utmost for His Highest" by Oswald Chambers and it is awesome. The first day, Jan. 1sts reading summed up my hope for this next years resolution/goal. It is really a lifelong goal, but I want to focus more intensely on it. Anway, here is the entry to read on day one of this book. I hope you like it.

"My eager desire and hope being that I may never feel ashamed, but that now as ever I may do honour to Christ in my own person by fearless courage." Phil. 1:20 My utomost for his highest. My eager desire and hope being that I may never feel ashamed. We shall all feel very much ashamed if we do not yield to Jesus on the point He has asked us to yield to him. Paul says---My determination is to be my utmost for His Highest. To get there is a question of will, not of debate or reasoning, but a surrender of will, an absolute and irrevocable surrender on that point. An overweening consideration for ourselves is the thing that keeps us from that decision, though we put it that we are considering others. When we consider what it will cost others if we obey the call of Jesus, we tell God He does not know what our obedience will mean. Keep to the point; He Does Know! Shut out every other consideration and keep yourself before God for this one thing only...My Utmost for His Highest. I am determined to be absolutely and entirely for Him and for Him alone. My undeterredness for His holiness. Whether that means life or death, no matter! (Verse 21). Paul is determined that nothing shall deter him from doing exactly what God wants. God's order has to work up to a crisis in our lives because we will not heed to a gentler way. He brings us to the place where He asks us to be our utmost for Him and we begin to debate; then he produces a providential crisis where we have to decide---for or against, and from that point the "Great Divide" begins. If the crisis has come to you on any line, surrender your will to Him absolutely and irrevocably.

I want to ask every morning in my quiet time, before I start the day, "What do you want me to do today Lord?" I want His voice, His whisper to be stronger than my busy agenda so that I don't miss the opportunity to join in His work, His plan. I need to work daily on trusting God enough to "Go forth/ a going out of my comfort zone to follow Him. God doesn't always reveal what He is going to do, (but He does reveal Himself!) so it requires faith to wait or follow in blind trust. But who better to trust. I need to let my attitude be a continual going out in dependence upon God until there is nothing between me and Him.